The Mawby Christmas Party

The employees at Mawby’s liked Christmas a lot.
But the Grinch that employed the employees — did not!

From his office high over the tasting room floor. 
He could tell they were planning a party galore.
At the winery there would be guests by the score.
With supplies to be Fed-Ex’d right here to his door.

He could picture them all with their glasses and steins. 
They’d eat all his goat cheese. They’d drink all his wines. 
On paté and Toasteds they’d lavishly dine.
And worst of all each would feel perfectly fine.
“They’ll eat and they’ll drink all that’s mine, mine, mine, mine!”

So he made up a plan to relieve and deprive. 
Meeting Fed-Ex each day at the top of the drive. 
He’d take all their goodies before they arrive. 
And without these a party — just couldn’t survive. 

His plan now in place, he thought, thought, thought, thought.
“I must have a scapegoat in case I get caught.”
“There’s certainly someone to blame this all on.” 
And then he remembered — “I’ll blame it on Don.”

When everyone came to the party and feast. 
There was no Cremant. There was no roast beast. 
No Mille, no Talismon, cheeses or hams. 
No gluten-free crackers that Dave gets at Sam’s. 

Then all of the guests turned their eyes to the ceiling, 
As the drywall gave way on which Larry was kneeling. 
His plan run amok — the hole now revealing. 
The party supplies he had long been concealing. 

The partiers gathered in stunned disbelief. 
They’d figured Don Hartwig was surely the thief. 
The tiniest guest hoped it couldn’t be true. 
And everyone listened as Kelsey Lou Who said, 
“He couldn’t have done it. It must be a lie.” 
Then Kelsey Lou Who simply started to cry, 
As she asked of her boss, “Why Larry? Why? Why?”

But the crafty old Grinch merely shrieked with delight. 
As he told all the guests he’d been waiting all night. 
To surprise the whole crowd when the time was just right. 
With the wine and the food he had kept out of sight. 

So the party commenced that was doomed at the start. 
And the Grinch — it was clear — had a huge change of heart. 
Thus the food was arranged in the room to the east. 
As they all settled in for the long-waited feast. 
And with Kelsey Lou Who — Larry carved the roast beast.


Copyright © 2011 by David Mertz

History of the Michigan State Police Houghton Lake Post

Baked Cod Provencal

This is a really easy way to add some wonderful flavor to the mild taste of baked cod.  I leave a little more liquid from the tomatoes in the skillet and let it cook down.  I like the extra moisture in the sauce, especially with the rice.  This is quick, easy, and tastes like you ordered it in a fine restaurant.

Baked Cod Provencal

1 Pound Cod Fillets

1 Medium Onion, Diced or in Rings

2 Small Cans of Diced Tomatoes (Mostly Drained)

1/4 Green Pepper, Diced

2 Teaspoons Capers

1/4 Cup Fresh Basil, Chopped

12 Various Olives, Pitted and Halved

1 Tablespoon Fresh Lemon Juice

2 Teaspoons Italian Seasoning

Preheat oven to 450 degrees.

Wick moisture from the cod fillets on a paper towel.  Salt and pepper the fillets on both sides and set aside.

In a skillet, sauté onions in a small amount of olive oil.  Add green pepper and continue sautéing.  Add diced tomatoes with some of the liquid, capers, olives, lemon juice, and Italian seasoning.  Simmer for 5-10 minutes adding fresh basil toward the end.

Spoon half the mixture in the bottom of a 6 by 10 inch baking dish.  Place the seasoned cod fillets on top of the mixture in the baking dish, then add the remainder of the sautéed mixture on top of the cod fillets.

Bake uncovered for 20 minutes.

Serve fillets over long grain and wild rice, spooning additional tomato mixture over the fillets and rice.  Garnish with lemon wedges.

Lance Armstrong is No Champion

“There will always be someone to champion the cause
of the obviously guilty.”

So why continue harping on Lance Armstrong?  Because the term “cheating” doesn’t even come close to defining the damage he has done and continues to do.  He is a thief.  And the fact that he stole the yellow jersey seven times in France is only a small part of the theft.  The actual winner of those races was the first person to cross the finish line who had not tried to “level the field.”  And who were those people?  Nobody knows.  Nobody knows because Lance Armstrong not only stole the spotlight, he also stole their identities.  He took their place on the podium, their accolades, their endorsements, and the money that follows.

He spit in the face of cycling—the sport he claimed to love—with an elaborate, conspiratorial, and systematic self-elevation scheme that heavily tipped the scales in his favor while rigorously repeating his mantra of "deny, deny, deny."

Everything Lance Armstrong does is meticulously calculated to benefit Lance Armstrong.  He struck a deal for a self-serving interview with a TV personality that was more an attempt to commute his life-long ban from competitive sports and elicit some modicum of sympathy rather than come clean.  His performance was coached, choreographed, and practiced to mitigate his guilt, yet he was unable to produce a single tear or show real remorse.  Let’s be clear.  Admissions are not confessions.  And partial admissions to a talk show host cannot substitute for truthfully answering questions from the governing body of the cycling world that has so much to ask.

And to those battling cancer who trusted and found inspiration until the alarm bell was too loud to explain or ignore, he has stolen a piece of their souls with the realization that they should have chosen a better hero.

The Tour de Lance

- The Sum of all Parts -

As the heat of accusations started to Crank up, Lance Armstrong Spoke with Oprah Winfrey on Cable to Brake his silence, attempting to Stem the criticism.  Always Shifting, trying to Wheel and deal while Spinning his deceitful Chain of events, it was clear he had Geared-up for the interview.  Watching Lance, Saddled with the faux-guilt he Pedaled, I began to Frame an opinion as I tried to get my Bearings on how he lost his Grip and became the Caliper of person he is.  As I began to Tire, it was obvious he should just shut up, go through the Cycle, and Fork over his titles.